iProphet
by StupidSequel
Summary: Carly and her friends are bored of every Halloween related activity and are searching for something scary to do, so they try to attract actual threats by showing an image of Mohammed on their web show I do not go into much detail .


**iProphet**

It was near Halloween, and Carly and her clique were bored out of their minds.

"God, we've been through every haunted house at least twenty times. It's like watching Disney's Alice in Wonderland at least eighty times," Sam bitched.

"Hmmm. We could go to Son of Waverly Hills. We haven't been there yet. It's the bigger, badder sequel to Waverly Hills in Loowis Vil, Kentucky." Freddy suggested.

"If it actually is scary at all, even if it's only a hair diameter above not scary at all, then it's better than nothin'." Sam continued.

They got tickets in line for Son of Waverly Hills and got in line for the haunted house. The wait was over 8 hours.

"If the line is this long, it's gotta be good," one of them said.

Much to their disappointment, the house was not scary at all despite the bins with real severed limbs of soldiers, actors wearing Justin Bieber costumes, and severed limbs of some of the actors wearing Justin Bieber costumes. Oh, and one of the actors was yo momma. Yo momma is so ugly, she belongs here!

When they got out, this was their reaction: ._.

"YAWN!" Sam yelled. "That was about as scary as heaven!"

"Burn this bitch down!" Carly yelled.

"Wanna have a Halloween party?" Freddy axed.

"Those are so 2000 and late! C'mon, we need to do something scary! That was supposed to be the scariest haunted house in the world, and it was so boring I might as well be in school. I don't wanna go to school unless I'm sleepy and don't feel like sleeping in my bed," Sam tantrummed.

"I just thought of something. Two episodes of South Park, 200 and 201, were banned because referencing the Muslim prophet Mohammed caused the show's creators to actually be threatened by terrorists. What if we took a little controversial leap and did the same thing during our web show? That would be the scariest thing ever, to be threatened by terrorists," Carly said while rubbing her hands together like a villain.

On Halloween, they started a web show Halloween special episode on their web show iCarly.

"Hey everyone, ready for a real scream? Well, here's our special guest star, the Muslim Prophet Mohammed." Freddy was dressed in a costume resembling the Muslim prophet Mohammed (the actual TV episode would show him as a giant black censor bar, just like Comedy Central).

"Hi, everybody, I-" The following series of scenes is just a series of acts done by Freddy in the Mohammed costume doing things that Muslims would consider blasphemous. Well, except for Mohammed giving Carly a salmon helmet while Carly was wearing a toga.

"Wow, a salmon helmet. Thanks!" said she.

I, the author of this story, have chickened out on describing everything else in detail because I do not want to be targeted myself or to offend any Muslim readers, so here is something else instead:

One day someone was playing Donkey Kong Country Returns on a high def TV. When they got frustrated on the first level, they promptly turned the game off, disconnected the Wii, and brutally smashed the Wii with a hammer. He said thru gritted teeth "I want to destroy every copy of Donkey Kong Country Returns in the entire world, and destroy every Wii in the entire world so that in case any DKCR copies remain, no one can play them. The difficulty of the first level alone is enough that I would not wish it upon anyone, ever! I need to raise awareness about the extreme difficulty of this game so that no more copies can be made or sold. It's almost like Nintendo took inspiration from various Kaizo hacks."

"Those terrorists are sure to target us now!" Carly chuckled. To get an idea of what the Mohammed actor did, well, I'll give you a small hint: know what? JUST KIDDING!

A few minutes after their web show, a squadron of attack planes showed up right outside Carly's house.

"Here they come! Oh man, my adrenaline is going through the roof! I think it might actually be working!"

"Al Qaeda! Hey! I missed you guys!" Instead of tan guys wearing robes and turbans like they were expecting, the evil terrorist organization that caused 9/11 was a bunch of metrosexual and drag looking white guys kissing each other.

"We are not Al Qaeda! We are Al Gaydar! But you have blasphemed against our prophet Mohammed. You will burn like the pile of burning kindles in a land far far away. And I am also detecting large amounts of gay in your party. Carly and Sam, you two are lesbians and are attracted to one another. And Freddy, you are also gay. Your crush on Carly is fake. You are actually attracted to Nevil." Everyone looked at Freddy as if he had grown another head. They all knew deep down that the Al Gaydar's statements were true. "We all have gaydars. That is why we are called Al Gaydar."

Al Gaydar got back into their planes and crashed into Carly's house, setting it ablaze. Carly, Sam, and Freddy barely got out alive, with a whole bunch of third degree burns.

"Lame," they said in unison. "That was about as scary as heaven and boring as a 3 mph roller coaster."

"I know, right? Even though we barely survived while suffering disfiguring burns, it still was not scary at all." Carly and Freddy nodded in agreement.

A whole news camera crew came up to the trio.

"You survived a terrorist attack and called it boring and weren't scared?"

"Yes. Terrorist attacks are nothing to be afraid of. They are also so 2000 and late. If we can think they're boring, then so can everyone in the US." And with those awe inspiring words, the NDAA and TSA were repealed, all military drones were burned, and the twin towers in New York City were rebuilt with the exact same floor-plan. Except one brick was placed 1 nanometer out of place.


End file.
